Chapter Fourteen – He Likes Me, He Likes Me Not.

The game was afoot. “What game?”, you might ask. Well, the game of the heart. It’s a very tricky game to play and I’ve never quite preferred it. It’s humbling, it’s grueling and it turns you into this feral creature. Lord knows the cruel things we do and say when the game isn’t going our way.

Lara was back in school by Sunday evening and I spared no time in recounting my experience the night before and how confused I was. She was very excited about it, especially because she really liked Sly. I told her how skeptical I was about everything.

“Oh, for goodness’ sake! Araba, you always do this. You’re always so afraid of love. Why?”

I didn’t want to mention how she and Boateng had set a very bad example of what it can do. She did catch on though.

“I know that those around you have done a very shit job of showing you what it’s like, but that doesn’t mean you should shield yourself off. Your walls are up and it’s preventing you from enjoying love. So, what if your heart breaks? I think Sly will be worth it.”

She had given me a lot to think about. Every time I had come close to liking someone or entering a relationship, I had managed to sabotage it by dwelling on the person’s flaws and eventually ghosting.

I was actually petrified about the idea of liking someone and it not working out or liking someone and them seeing all my flaws and deciding they didn't like me. The idea of it was terrifying for me. I suppose that’s why I was more willing to explore things with Boateng. He was safe. He already knew me and I knew him. I didn’t have to be anything but myself with him and he had already seen every flaw.

If I did somehow like Sly, I would have to be my best self around him and constantly live in fear that I might slip up. Knowing that I cannot pretend forever, the fear he would be disgusted eventually and leave was very real.

Mind you, reader, it’s not like I’m some filthy, booty scratching girl but I’m human. I have many flaws. Chief among them as you may have seen, is that I talk too much. How deeply it would hurt me if Sly hated this.

In any case, love is overrated. I’ve survived these 18 years without it and there’s absolutely no reason why I should need it now. My life was very much complete. Love is like a drug, really. You live your life perfectly without it but the moment you try it, you become hooked and now when it isn’t going your way, you become a junkie looking for a quick fix. Take Boateng for example, he was out here hopping from woman to woman. I have never known him to go two weeks without another girl on his arm.

I didn’t want to be that way. I wanted to be okay being by myself. The idea of needing someone else just doesn’t sit right with me.

Besides, why was I considering all this? Sly hadn't professed his love and I don’t suppose I have any love to profess either.

*

I wasn’t the only one recounting yesterday’s events. Boateng spitefully shared with Carl what happened when he met Sly. He told Carl how rude and proud Sly was and how he didn’t trust him. Carl said he found this strange since he and Sly got along swimmingly and had never had any problems.

Carl then suggested that perhaps Boateng was just jealous. He let out a beastly sound that was supposed to pass for laughter but as you can imagine, it didn’t convince Carl who chose to press the matter further.

“It makes sense for you to be jealous. You’ve been the leading man in her life for as long as you two have known each other. Even if Sly isn’t interested in her romantically, the idea that he might replace you can be upsetting” Carl had said.

“First of all, he’s definitely interested in her romantically. I saw the way he looked at her. Besides, Araba is an amazing girl. There’s no way he got that close and didn’t catch feelings. Then second of all, no one said anything about him replacing me. He’s not. I’m just saying that there’s something fishy about him and I don’t trust him around her”.

Carl laughed so hard he fell off his chair. He struggled to regain his composure. “But you’ve been close to Araba for like four years and you haven’t caught feelings. Or have you?”

Boateng was beginning to regret sharing his frustrations with Carl. “I’m different. Our relationship is different”.

“Dude! You literally told this girl one time that you liked her. I don’t think you were lying.”

“I was. I was confused at the time.”

“The only person you’re lying to is yourself, bro.”

*

The semester was drawing to a close, which meant that my money was on red and the fridge was empty. I had about three sachets of water left before I would completely run out.

I was living on the edge of life. The sad part was I had already taken some more money from my father not too long ago but alas, the mask of plenty made me frivolous and now here I was mixing gari and sugar.

Now, here’s a little tip dear reader. Gari is like water, if not more vital. You must have that and some shito. In a few short words, I will explain to you, the advantages of this marvelous food.

Next to plantain, gari is the next best discovery made by man. It’s such a versatile dish capable of making a porridge for breakfast and supper and for lunch, pour some hot water on that boy, let it soak and then put a side of shito. Literal perfection. This one ingredient has provided you with three square meals. Fantastic.

Another meal that can save you is Hausa koko. Hausas coming to Ghana is one of the few blessings received from colonialism. That porridge costs so little and yet can satisfy. The faithful sellers are there in the morning for breakfast and there at night for supper. When you have a few extra coins, you can add in some groundnuts or milk for creativity. Otherwise, the raw porridge it is.

Also, not to forget kenkey. Another trusted dish that can serve as both breakfast and supper. On a good day, it could be blended into a nice drink.

The list remains endless but these are the three meals upon which I survived in my state of destitution.

Now that I have bored you with meal suggestions, let’s revert back to the story.

I had been pouring out my gari for breakfast when Sly called. I was about to pick when there was a knock at the door. I answered the phone and walked to the door. I saw him standing there with a smile on his face and a pack of food in his hands. I opened the door wider for him to come in.

“It’s revision week and I remember how you said you forget to eat so I brought you this” he said, handing the food over to me. I was far too starved to turn it away. “It’s fried rice and chicken from that place you said you liked. I wasn’t sure if you liked your chicken fried or grilled but then I’ve seen you enjoy a good piece of fried chicken so I got that.”

“Thank you” I squealed setting it on the table in excitement. He stood there for a while and the situation was quickly turning awkward.

“Yeah, so this is just a small gesture from a mentor to his mentee. This is your first exam; how do you feel?”

I was a little bummed that he added that part but then it cleared the air on where our relationship stood.

“I’m definitely nervous. I hope it’s nothing like Mr. Mintah’s test” I said with a chuckle.

He laughed and said “well, remember what I taught you and if you need anything, you know I got you”.

We hugged and then he left.

Lara opened the balcony door and startled me. I completely forgot she was there. She was also in her broke girl era and had resorted to getting some fresh air in place of breakfast.

“Wow! I felt that in my soul!” she exclaimed.

I kissed my teeth. “Felt what? Did you hear him? I’m a mentee to him. That’s all.”

“Then you’re even dumber than I thought. Miss mamas, no man buys a woman her favorite food from her favorite place to wish her best of luck just because he’s her mentor. Brother, maybe. But mentor? Girl, be for real. That man has fallen. He’s in the trenches and me thinks you’re in there with him.”

Boateng and I had been texting earlier and I mentioned how I was now on a strict gari diet so he decided to pass by so we could get something to eat. He would pay for it since his father had sent him a huge amount of money ‘for fun’ as he termed it.

He was shocked to find me biting into some chicken and humming a sweet melody.

“Where did you get this? You told me you were going to eat gari” Boateng said in confusion.

“Yes, I was” I replied, pointing to my bowl of gari that was sitting on top of the counter. His face screamed question marks. “Sly brought me this as a way of wishing me all the best” I said before biting into the chicken some more.

Boateng was livid.